Friday, April 16, 2010

Beauty Picks for April!

So I have done a little revising to my beauty regime and I am in love with a few new products ... and of course I know all you ladies are always on the look out for the new 'miracle product' so here's a quick post just to share my new discoveries.

First ... Is your Maybelline Great Lash Mascara getting a little boring? Need to shake it up? Want a long, lush look without the Jersey Shore clumps? Then don't walk, RUN, to your nearest Sephora or department store. I am obsessed with:


Long, dark, full... yet pretty natural looking lashes! Perfect! It's a few more buckaroos than your Great Lash .... but the eyes are the windows to the soul ladies ... Don't you think your soul DESERVES prettier curtains?!

 BUT if you really can't justify the purchase (did you SEE the before and after picture??... Damn you economy!) then I highly recommend L'Oreal Voluminous Mascara. L'Oreal is actually the same company as Lancome so you are getting pretty similar stuff! 

Sans any other make up: Moi with Hypnose Drama (Left) and without (Right) 
.... whoooa check that out! No clumps! Yes, those are 100% my lashes. Double the length! Ridic right? 

If you are as obsessed as I am and wanna buy ASAP, if you order online at here at Sephora, join their VIP Club, and then enter the code: VIBMADNESS at check out you get 15% off your entire purchase! Or you can just check out some sample freebees you can load up onto your order HERE

Now let's move on to the basics. Your face. I'm kind of crazy about face products because I have just entered my mid-twenties (Where does the time go? FML). Therefore I have become hyper-conscious about taking care of my skin now .... so I don't look super old later. Preventative action is key. Once you get a wrinkle.... it's almost impossible to get rid of without Botox or plastic surgery. It's much easier to do a little extra work now and ward off wrinkles before they form .... than to erase them once you have them.

I'm smiling on the inside I swear! 

Now if you are in your twenties like me ... it's a little early to start piling on the anti-wrinkle cream. In fact it is BAD for you. Our skin still produces sebum (skin grease ew) unlike the 40 year old women this stuff is made for ... so it clogs your pores and then you get breakouts. Aggggh. 

But one key thing to help keeping your skin looking fresh is an exfoliant. Some of the cheaper brands are actually TOO HARSH (Like the favorite St. Ives Apricot Scrub) on your skin and you end up doing more damage. Yeah, don't feel bad ... I didn't know this either until about 20 facialists were like "AAHHH NO NO ST. IVES NO NO ST. IVES!"

Last summer I was singing in Aspen and took a little indulgence massage trip to the Remede Spa at the St. Regis (i.e. Thanks Mom!) and they were giving away free samples.... which is how I discovered this miracle scrub.

I put it on my face and it was the first exfoliant I've ever used that didn't feel like I was scrubbing my face off -- And after my face felt smoother than a baby's butt. Upon further research this scrub is also what our favorite Mad Men milky skinned beauty, January Jones, uses to give her face that Grace Kelly-porcelain glow. 

Betty uses Remede Sweep ... Two-Face used St. Ives Apricot Scrub... awkward

You can only get this miracle scrub from the Bliss website. And if the price tag is a little steep and you opt for a cheaper version... then just make sure you aren't using an exfoliator with giant granules. The bigger the granule the worse it is for your skin. And remember to rub gently. For a more economic option I also like Biore Pore Minimimizing Microderm Exfoliator.

Also while buying my Remede Sweep I stumbled upon ....


I had heard tons of raves about this mask and decided to try for myself. Boy those raves reviews weren't lying! One use of this baby and your face looks all fresh and rosy like you just got a good nights sleep .... (Sleep?? What is that?) This 5 minute foam mask uses oxygen and lots of antioxidants to rehydrate and rejuvenate the skin. Again, not exactly cheap ... but a little goes a long way thanks to the foaming action and the squirt pump prevents you from using too much ... and you are only supposed to use 3x a week MAX... so I'm predicting the bottle lasts a while. For the tired ladies out there like me, I consider this an investment. Pick up some here at the Bliss website

As a little incentive if you enter the code: WEL410 at check out Bliss will give a you a free full-sized sample of their Lemon & Sage Body Butter and Free Shipping! (Expires: May 31, 2010)

Celebs like Eva Longoria and Madonna are fans!

Eva before and after her Oxygen Facial ..... ok not really but I bet it helped! 

Alright that's all the discoveries for now. I'm sure I will find more soon and will be sure to share! 


Thursday, April 8, 2010

To Jort or not to Jort... That is the question: The Spring/Summer '10 Jean Short Trend

3:54PM Eastern Standard Time I get a distressed call from my dear friend Meghan. She has the misfortune of being based in Bloomington, Indiana.
"Now I know that Indiana is not the center of the fashion universe, but JORTS?! JEAN SHORTS?! They are EVERYWHERE! You are up to date with fashion trends ... please tell me they are not back. Please. God. No." 

I had to sigh and concede to dear Meghan. Yes, the fashion Gods have decided ... the jean short is back. But what I suspect has happened is what usually happens when the jean short makes a foray back into the trend-o-sphere ..... there is little research on "HOW" to wear them and Soristitutes pull out their Daisy Duke cutoffs from 1999 (that were always a little too short and are more than a little too tight 10 years later) and parade them around innocently because .... they are "back in right?!?" But the end result is less Nicole Richie and more Honky-Tonk Whore.

These didn't look good on you in 8th grade and they sure as hell don't now

So as per Meghan's request, today's blog will explore the do's and don'ts of the infamous Jean Short. 


Ok, there are 4 KEY factors to consider when wearing this updated summer staple

** The new short is a little baggier and a touch longer than the previous 90's Daisy Duke cutoff version. If I can see the crease where your ass meets your thigh.... they are too short. 
  1. They are cutting into your thigh
  2. You have a camel toe
  3. You have a muffin top
Then they are too tight. 
Wannabe Rap Video Ho and White Trash Floozy are generally looks to "avoid"

** One of the most IMPORTANT keys to update this look to keep you from being mistaken as "A Hooker at a Tim McGraw concert" is WHAT you are pairing the shorts with. Your shorts are short, so your top should NOT be tight. Pair them with a a blousy or loose fitting shirt to balance out the fact you are showing a lot of leg.
Don't feel bad. Celebrities have Rachel Zoe to style them and tell them how to not look like cheap prostitutes.
Then again you can take the girl out of the trash .... but you can never take the trash out of the girl. To demonstrate the Tight Tank/Daisy Duke DON'T ... Ladies and Gentleman ...


Oops she did it again ... 

Difference: Jessica is wearing a costume portraying a White Trash character, Brit is wearing this in Real Life. 

** Now we must talk about Footwear. Under NO CIRCUMSTANCE may you wear JORTS of any kind with SNEAKERS. You are not from Alabama on a family vacation at Disney World. Christ if you do this you might as well tack on a Fanny Pack. 


** And finally ladies... we all have different body types ... and every woman is beautiful in their own way (blah blah blah) but please.... be honest with yourself. If your thighs are .... not your "best asset".... then maybe you should leave the Jorts alone all together. I'm not saying you have to be one of those anorexic bitches who's thighs don't even touch.... but if you can't go 5 minutes without getting Chub-Rub or are unfortunately plagued with cellulite (bless your heart) ... then maybe the Jorts aren't for you. Fashion is supposed to HIGHLIGHT our best assets. A classic look that flatters you will always win over every "trend" for the rest of time. Do yourself a favor and just throw on a pretty summer dress! Ok?! .... Please....

So ..... I hope this guide has helped (some of) you ladies navigate the potential pitfalls of this season's infamous JORT trend. 

PIPERLIME has a great selection of the updated jean short if you would like to peruse. My favorites are these by Joe's Jeans:

But let's be clear. It is NOT ok for men under any circumstances to ever wear Jean Shorts..... Unless you are related to these guys:

And please don't abuse Casual Friday at the Workplace ....