Euro Fashion Report auf Deutsch: Hamburg Edition

So what does a little American girl all by her lonesome do in Hamburg, Germany when she knows no one and has nothing to do all day? Shop of course. Well at least window shop.

As a semi-frequent European traveller I have noticed that Euros are generally anywhere between 3 months to a year ahead of fashion trends... yet they inevitably reach America ....eventually. So I'm going to let y'all in on what's coming for Spring/Summer/Next Fall.

Biggest Trend: SEQUINS! - They are eeeeeverywhere. On everything and anything. Not even just for evening. Break out your disco meets Dynasty fantasies cause Sequins are back in a BIG way.

Also:

Girly details - namely lots of lace and ruffles.

Blush tones - Peach, light pink, nudes/naturals

Aqua

Boyfriend Jackets/Cardigans

To give you a little real life tour - I took the liberty of snapping outfits in the H&M dressing room. Oh yes. I was that girl. No, I did not buy all these things... Kendallina's on a strict budget. But rest assured every piece pictured is between 13 - 30 Euros (hard to believe I know) and can be bought at H&M Europe......... now you will also probably wonder "WHY THE HELL IS H&M SO MUCH CUTER AND CHEAPER IN EUROPE THAN IN AMERICA?". I have no idea. Probably part of the European conspiracy to keep Americans looking way less chic than the Euros and laughing cause we pay more for it.

Enjoy:

SEQUINS

GIRLY DETAILS/BLUSH TONES

AQUA

GENERAL HILARIOUS EUROTRASH

Ja! Schon! Du BIST rock... und sooooo kewl auf französisch

How to survive flying Coach International without wanting to kill yourself

So tomorrow I'm spending Valentine's Day on airplanes. Off to Europe for some opera auditions. Exciting, yes..... but looking forward to spending 8 hours cramped in a tiny coach seat to arrived jet lagged..... not as fun.

Fortunately I have flown across the pond a few times so I think I have mastered "The Art of International Coach Travel" swimmingly. For those of us who don't have a couple grand to shell out on First Class ... I'm going to let you in on my secrets of Coach Comfort.

This is my carry on arsenal:



Included:

For In Flight Prep (i.e. Before Naptime)
ANTIBACTERIAL SPRAY - Flights are one of the dirtiest places ever with all that recycled air... do yourself a favor ... beat the Swine and whatever else is living on your arm rest. Do a little swab down of your armrest/tray table/window - and spray your hands before you eat.
HAIR CLIP
FACE WIPES - Do your pores a favor and wipe off any makeup. 8 hours in a seat no one cares what you look like I promise.
MOISTURIZER - Flights are EXTREMELY drying for skin. Slather on some lightweight moisturizer before you doze off to avoid skin havoc later.
LIP BALM - Same deal goes for lips.
EVIAN SPRAY - Little beauty traveler tip. This is basically water in an aerosol can. WHY? You spritz your face after putting on moizuturizer to help lock it in and uber-moisturize naturally.

In flight entertainment:
KINDLE - I love the Kindle. I have 6 books pre-loaded already to go for my perusal with no bulk. A frequent traveling readers dream.
SHEET MUSIC - Unless you are an opera singer.... you probably won't need to bring your music. But let me tell you... airline loses your bags... you can buy new clothes... trying to find a random Handel Aria in the middle of nowhere is damn near impossible.
TRANSLATION DICTIONARIES/PHRASEBOOKS - If you are going to a foreign country. Take this time to brush up on your Guten Tag's and Buon Giorno's.

How to pass out and stay asleep:
XANAX - You may laugh. You may call me a druggie. But damn if this stuff won't knock you the HELL out. It's the most wonderful drug ever. You take some, sleep, wake up not groggy in London and feel like you took a 15 min power nap. I've tried Lunesta and Ambien ... both make me groggy and have scary dreams. Tylenol PM doesn't keep me asleep long enough. Seriously... if you can get a Rx for even a couple pills for your travel... you will thank me a million times over when you don't want to kill yourself from jet lag the next day.
BLOW UP NECK PILLOW - Now I've seen those of you with the big stuffed ones. Well I'll tell you... they don't support your neck as well as the cheap-o blow up one and they are bulky and obnoxious to carry. But if you have any hope in hell of sleeping a wink in the tiny chair that reclines approximately 4 inches.... you need a neck pillow.
EYE MASK - You may feel silly... but they give them out for free in first class for a reason. Block out that light and you will sleep better.
EARPLUGS/EARPHONES - Now I'm a musician so I've invested in some sweet over-the-ear Noise-Cancelling earphones. They actually supply these in First Class too. But if you don't really have a practical reason to shell out for fancy earphones... nice little $2.99 foam plugs will do just fine.
CASHMERE SLIPPERS - Ok this is a bit indulgent... but so heavenly. Shoes are hard to sleep in... and these keep your tootsies warm. How pretty are these? I love the sparkles. I found them for only $40 (marked down from $120) at MARTIN + OSA online. Go check them out!
LAVENDER OIL - Put a little on your temples to block out the weird Indian food smell from the person next to you and also very relaxing.

Freshening up in the morning:
ANTI PUFFY EYE ROLLER - This one is great to travel with by Garnier. Helps with those pesky bags in the morning.
COMPACT & BLUSH - Nothing will perk up your overall complexion like a little powder and some flush to your cheeks.
DEODORANT - Do I need to explain? I don't care if you are going to the goddamn Congo, that is no excuse to stink. DO YOU HEAR ME?
TEASING COMB and HAIRSPRAY - Now I'm from the south... that means big voluminous hair all the time. Add a little lift to your now flattened sad plane hair with a little tease and some flexible hold hairspray.
EMERGEN-C - You are probably feeling kind of out of it from lack of sleep/time changing which is a big stress on your immune system. Help it out a little and chug a packet mixed with water.
TRIDENT - For lovely morning breath.
TIGHTS - If you are traveling to a colder destination in winter ... many of us know that a good layering technique is tights under your jeans/leggings. Tights on a plane are super uncomfy though... so bring them with you and change in the bathroom when you get there.

Other:
JEWELRY - Heaven forbid the airline lose your bag.... DON'T PACK YOUR GOOD JEWELRY IN THERE! Always bring it with you in your carry on. Learned that the hard way.

Well .. Now I'm off! Hope this helps you next time you travel International or take the Red-Eye.

Arrivaderci amici! Baci!

Headband Headache? I have the solution!

So I've currently moved abodes and as most of you who have moved before know... this is a painful process. Especially when you are moving into a smaller space. All of the sudden you realize.... crap.... where do I PUT everything?

Today's organizational challenge: HEADBANDS

Clearly this box will not do. The headband queen and a personal idol of mine, Miss Blair Waldorf, would cringe if she saw the state of my haircessories.

Kendallina.... the headbands!! For shame. Who are you?! VANESSA?

So I ask myself? What would Blair do? The answer: She clearly has a cute and chic headband organizer.

So I google.... with no avail. This leaves me one option... I must get crafty. Granted Blair would not actually make hers... she would get Doroda to do it. But unfortunately I don't live on the Upper East Side with millions of dollars at my disposal, so I head myself to Hobby Lobby.

Here is what you need to make your own super-cute HEADBAND RACK (Enough for 2):

2 1/2 yards thick ribbon

4 yards thinner ribbon in a contrasting color (helps if there is wire lining in the ribbon)

Small garland of faux flowers attached on a wire

2 bags small fabric "accents" such as flowers (can be found in wedding invitation aisle)

Glue Gun

1. First lay out about a yard of the thick ribbon. Take the glue gun and dot glue at the top of ribbon and attach the smaller ribbon at top. Then release about an inch of the smaller ribbon to make a gap (where you will loop the headbands in) and then dab another dot of glue. Make 12 loops.

2. Take the flower garland and wrap wire stem up and around to make a loop. This will the be 'hanger'.

3. Fold over the top of the ribbon to make a nice folded edge and secure with glue. Then glue on the flower garland to the top of the ribbon.

4. Take fabric accents and glue into the "loop grooves" of the ribbon. As seen in photo here:

5. Finally at the very bottom of ribbon, fold edge over and glue for a finished edge.

And VOILA!!! Finished!

So cute you can should even make 2!

Yeah move over Martha.... Kendallina just got crafty on yo ass.

(It's ok, Martha actually likes being talked to like that... she's been to prison)

Oh yeah and Congrats to the SAINTS for being the SUPER BOWL CHAMPS! WHO DAT? GEAUX SAINTS!!!!

Jackie & Marilyn's Valentine Lingerie Picks

February is here and Valentine's Day is quickly approaching. That means men are scrambling to figure out what to buy their girlfriends/wives .... whereas the girls are probably just trying to figure out what to wear. Sure, she's probably thinking about dinner outfits.... but if she's smart she will be thinking about what to wear under her clothes for after dinner ;)

Girls, if there is one day of the year you should think about putting away the standby comfy cotton undies... it's this one. Have a little fun! Your man will surely thank you.

In general, most women can be separated into two types... well at least in the often simplistic heads of men. (And lets be honest... who is lingerie really for hm?) These two primary female archetypes were never more stylishly illustrated than with the two main squeezes in the life of our 35th president of the United States of America, JFK. I am of course talking of his classy wife Jackie O and his sexy mistress Marilyn Monroe.

Time passes and this female dichotomy repeats itself over and over.... Jennifer or Angelina, Betty or Veronica, Blair or Serena? Each man has his preference and each woman usually identifies with either one or the other.

So keeping in tandem with these equally captivating yet contrasting personalities, I asked each of these ladies to pick out their choices for their nocturnal Valentine's day attire.

But Kendallina they are DEAD. How did they pick them out? I mean even if they were hypothetically alive they are probably flat out confused at the IDEA of the internet. GOSH.

Bitches, why are you getting obsessed with the details?! I busted out the Ouija Board Paranormal Activity style and asked them k? Deal with it.

Anyways, here are the ladies' picks at three various price points:

1. I have a sugardaddy
2. I have a job
3. I wish I had a job and/or sugardaddy

JACKIE'S PICKS

"Sex is a bad thing because it rumples the clothes" - Jackie O

MARILYN'S PICKS

"Nights are not just for sleep..." - Marilyn Monroe

If you need help figuring out if you are a Jackie or a Marilyn (Even an Audrey or an Ingrid) you can take this QUIZ.

or

If you are interested in the Jackie/Marilyn relationship you can pick up this delightful (yet fictional) READ.
or

If you think your man has pulled a Tiger Woods and has an actual clinical Madonna/Whore complex and you want to read more about it .... Sucks for you.... but you can read bout it in this Google BOOK or HERE or HERE .

Your 2010 Yearly Horoscope Forecast

So as I was flipping through the latest issue of F!D Luxe (The Dallas Morning News monthly fashion magazine insert), there was a fun section on everyones 2010 Yearly Forecast Horoscope. Each sign had the forecast and it corresponded with fun fashion and home stuff that correlated with that signs characteristics. Very cute spread.

Although most of us take our horoscopes with a grain of salt (although from what I've read I am the most stereotypical Cancer on the planet), it's always fun to read what the cosmos predict the year has in store for you.

I know the print is small - so click on the picture and it will blow it up for you in another tab.

Recessionista Shoe Picks for February

So those of you who know me might have noticed I have a penchant for pretty shoes. Slip on a truly gorgeous shoe is almost like wearing art. Shoes don't care if you gained 7.63 lbs over the holidays.... they still fit like a glove.... well not really a glove... but a shoe... wow that might be the worst use of that idiom ever.

But I digress. You get what I'm saying. Shoes can transform an outfit from blah to breathtaking in 2 seconds flat. In fact my fondness for footwear has been known to trump functionality and reason on several occasions. I have often been spotted teetering around in stilettos on the cobblestone streets of Europe... one time I even thought it was a good idea to climb a mountain in platform wedged thongs. Yeah....I can't say I always used my better judgement when picking out what to wear on my feet in such situations... but you can't tell me I didn't look good doing it. ;)

Ok, I know I know, we all love shoes.... but times are tough right now, budgets are tight. But just because you gotta tighten your belt doesn't mean your feet have to suffer.

Dan dan na naaaaah..... Kendallina to the rescue!!

I have scoured the sales and channeled my inner Recessionista for your benefit. All the shoes gathered here I handpicked for y'all and are budget friendly. The cheapest pair at only $30!! That's kind of insane. Most stick to the double digit numbers and none over $150.

Now it was very,very,very hard to leave off these babies' more expensive yet extrodinarily beautiful brothers and sisters... but we will leave them alone right now and save them for another blog. So if you see something you like... you don't have to feel guilty... just close your eyes and click... consider it Retail Therapy. ;)

I present to you... Kendallina's Recessionista Shoe Picks for February. Enjoy.

(P.S. If you didn't notice..... click on the little arrow on top and you can scroll to see more styles.... and if you click on the shoe it takes you to the website where you can buy it... Blog technology is ubercomplex I know .... kthnxbye)

Movie Review: Bright Star

So for those of you with a Netflix account in high rotation like mine, you may have noticed in the New Releases a period romance called Bright Star. The film is directed by Jane Campion who has directed other period dramas such as The Piano and Portrait of a Lady.

Now I rather enjoyed the film, but be warned if you have no interest in period dramas or poetry .... you will probably hate this movie. So just do yourself a favor and skip the review, and delete this movie from your Netflix cue. This is by no means some life changing movie that will make you think twice about your taste for the genre. But for the small minority of people out there who do enjoy this sort of thing, I would highly recommend the film.

The story follows the love interest/muse of the (in my humble opinion) the greatest of the Romantic poets, John Keats. At the time Keats is a penniless writer, his love interest Fanny is urged to hold out for a more wealthy suitor, Keats gets tuberculosis.... and since this real life vs. a Jane Austen novel ... their quixotic affair doesn't exactly end happily. But what separates this film from the many ... many superfluous formulaic romantic comedies out there is the actual pace of the romance itself. It is quiet, tender, and very slow by our 2010 instant gratification terms. I think for some this could translate in to slowness of plot, but I didn't find it as such. There is no steam in this one - PG rating for sure. But thats one of the things I found refreshing - it was all very realistic to the time. With a slow build and its abrupt end, their affair struck me as extremely passionate on a deep emotional level.

Campion highlighted snippets of their letters to each other, and this reminded me of my occasional longing of a simpler time. A time when lovers couldn't hide behind pithy text messages or Facebook chat; but rather since they were often separated by great distance for long periods of time, they had to communicate what they felt in actual letters. Not a brusque "how was your weekend?!" email... REAL letters... Letters that didn't just recount what happened last 'weekend', but how these things made you feel, what did they make you think about? Thoughts, feelings, concerns.... shocking concepts by todays typical standards of courtship. And these said letters were written with REAL words. Descriptive words that had actual meaning. No ttyl's, no lol's, no luv ya's. It was a time when people welcomed the idea of romance, and weren't afraid of communicating feelings in fear of "freaking the other person out"or constantly playing cat and mouse games to entrap the other's affections while still remaining "in control".

Just read this sonnet that Keats wrote (supposedly) for her:

Bright star, would I were stedfast as thou art--
Not in lone splendour hung aloft the night
And watching, with eternal lids apart,
Like nature's patient, sleepless Eremite,
The moving waters at their priestlike task
Of pure ablution round earth's human shores,
Or gazing on the new soft-fallen mask
Of snow upon the mountains and the moors--
No--yet still stedfast, still unchangeable,
Pillow'd upon my fair love's ripening breast,
To feel for ever its soft fall and swell,
Awake for ever in a sweet unrest,
Still, still to hear her tender-taken breath,
And so live ever--or else swoon to death.

Sigh..... I've always loved Keats.... heartbreakingly beautiful isn't it?

No? Oh well... there's always the non-stop loop of Jersey Shore to watch on MTV2.

(Fist pump)